21 December, 2011

A Lineup For Philadelphia

A Lineup for Philadelphia
with apologies to Ogden Nash

A is for Alex
The Great Alexander
More goose eggs he pitched
Than a popular gander

(bear with me here)

B is for Bull
The two Luzinskis
They gave us ribbies
And damp poetry

C is for Chooch
Carlos Ru-iz
He calls a great game
And iguanas he eats

D is for Daulton
Dutch filled in for Parrish
His knees gave us fits
But brought us a Series

E is for Ed
Big Delahanty
He was but a third
Of the outfield so dandy

F is for Philley
David Earl Philley
He wasn’t an All-Star
Just one of the Phillies

G is for Gavvy
Cactus Cravath
With all his homeruns
A poor man’s Babe Ruth

H is for Halladay
The Doc himself
He may not go to the Zoo
But batters’ faces, he melts

I is for Inky
Ruled the NCAA
He got his own rule
And always swung swung away

J is for Jimmy
The Mets didn’t like him
“The Team to Beat”
He said, that showed ‘em

K is for Klein
The Hoosier Hammer
He did his damage
In the Bowl called Baker

L is for the Leftys
Grove and O’Doul
There was Hoerst, Taber, Weinert
And Carlton was cool

M is for Manuel
Red Devil of Nippon
Heed his advice
Hit, like, we gon’

N is for Nolan
Edward Sylvester
No, not Ryan
The best nickname ever

O is for Ozark
He led us from the cellar
Flirted with 100
And led again, downstairs

P is for Puddin’ Head
Whiz Kid Willie Jones
Why he was called that
Nobody knows

Q is for Quantrill
Paul John Q
He was not terrible
But nobody knew

R is for the Rynes
Sandberg and Duren
Not Phils for long
An unconventional pairin’

S is for Schmidt
The great Michael Jack
He was our best
Thought we cut him no slack

T is for Terry
Terry Francona
He’s managed all over
Including Alaska

U is for Utley
He closed out the Vet
And at the Parade
Gave the best thrill yet

V is for Vic
The Flyin’ Hawaiian
His W.A.R.
Is very excitin’

W is for the Whiz Kids
Robbie and Richie
Andy, Dick, Del, Curt
And Jim Konstanty

X is the last of
The letters in Maddox
Covered one third of the Earth
And read lots of books

Y is for the Youngs
Bobby and Michael
Dick and Del
No, not that Michael

Z is for Zenith
The summit of fame
These men are up there
These men are the game our team.

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